Everything Update

Writing Personal: I’ll save writing for the end of the post so I don’t humiliate myself immediately. I’m going on vacation soon. I’ll be in another state for a week and a half. The regular Wednesday and Saturday posts will go up but I’m not sure I will be able to post anything else while I’m gone.

We’re going to New Jersey to visit my husband’s family. We’ll also spend a couple of days in Philadelphia. I’ve never been there (with the exception of the airport and a drive through on the way to the beach). We’re going to do touristy things like go to the zoo, the aquarium and the art museum. I’ll buy silly souvenirs for my kids and take massive amounts of pictures.

There is a chance I’ll post some of these photos if I fall in love any of them but I doubt anyone wants to see hundreds of shots of historical sites and ocean life.

Also, my husband says there is an abandoned summer camp near his parent’s house. I’m crossing my fingers we can get in there so I can take creepy pictures.

Photography: Speaking of photos, I’ve taken close to none lately. It was a choice but not one I wanted to make. Since I’m in physical therapy I decided I better not do anything to mess with it. I’m putting in a lot of hard work and I don’t want to sabotage my efforts by getting down on the pavement to take pictures of bugs or climb through foliage to find just the right shot and end up hurting myself.

The last time I pulled out the camera was the 4th of July. Most of those photos were of family. I really should edit those and send them out the people I told I would. Maybe after vacation.

Physical Therapy: Honestly, I don’t know how it’s going. In the beginning there was slow and steady progress. Then I felt like I hit a plateau. They increased the intensity on a couple of things but my back was in a phase of wanting to cause trouble so we didn’t push too far. The last two times I went I asked for more weights on a couple of exercises and it worked out well. I don’t know how much longer I’ll be doing this.

I also don’t think it’s helping the way my neurosurgeon hoped it would. I know he didn’t really think it would do the trick. I suspect he wanted me to try it just in case it worked.

At a recent appointment with the pain management doctor I was told something I didn’t want to hear but was also relieved to find out. After physical therapy if I still had pain they want to do another injection. The doctor said it will be more difficult (for him, not me) because of the fusion but ‘could’ work for me.

The relief was due to remembering the surgeon’s concern about the disk above the fusion. If none of this works I either put up with the pain (says the woman with the minuscule amount of pain tolerance) or start down the surgery road again. The first few weeks after the fusion were the worst of my life (pain-wise) so I hope to avoid going there again.

Reading: I finally finished the quad I’ve tried to read for months. I’ll probably start something new while on vacation when there is downtime and on the plane.

How did I find the time to read? Well, that brings me to my biggest problem…

Writing: What writing? My muse is MIA with no hint of where she went, how she’s avoiding detection or when she’ll be back. I use the word ‘she’ because she is me and I refuse to use the word ‘it’ when referring to my creativity.

I don’t know if I’m simply flighty or if this is a true case of writer’s block. Sometimes I don’t believe in writer’s block. I think it’s possible to be blocked on certain stories but there are always things to write about. They might not be the things you want to write but you can still write.

Other times, like the last couple of weeks, I believe you can be blocked from writing everything. This was the case for me. I tried working on my WIP. I attempted to plot a new story idea. I even searched through writing prompts – my own and others. Nothing worked. My lack of belief in writer’s block was tested.

Hell, I couldn’t even write a blog post until this one (which gives me hope)!

The one thing I have been able to do is think about writing. It didn’t get me doing the physical act but I know myself well enough to know there are seeds planted and eventually they will turn into words on a page.

There is one thing I believe will help the most with pulling me out of this slump. I’m not taking my laptop on vacation. I only packed one composition book, my Moleskine notebook and pocket journal. If I get inspired I will have to physically write stuff down. This is good for me. It’s a completely different creative process putting pen to paper than sitting staring at a screen.

I’ve tried writing freehand during this impasse and it didn’t work but I’ll be in a different environment for 9 days. Something is bound to happen. I live in the flattest place you can imagine with few trees and plenty of wide open spaces.

For a time I’ll be surrounded by hills and forest. I’ll visit historic sites and see animals that aren’t dogs and house cats. Maybe the abandoned boy scouts camp will inspire a creepy story or the threat of bears will make for a great suspenseful piece. My in-laws see bears in their backyard all the time so this is a real possibility and yes I’m terrified about it haha.

Street photography could bring up some ideas as well. Either way, the potential is there. Still, I type faster than I write with a pen. I hope to regret leaving my computer at home. I’d rather have the problem of too much to say to only use paper than the issues I’m having now.

Potential disaster/amazingness: The end of July and beginning of August every year is something I fear. Traditionally during this time something big happens, normally a bad and expensive something.

One year it was lightning striking the apartment we lived in and its subsequent destruction. The next year a lady destroyed our fence while trying to run down her husband with her car. There was the time we woke up to find our car had been totaled while parked in front of the house (something we normally don’t do). Last year my appendix tried its very hardest to rupture and I was forced to have emergency surgery while on vacation. Ugh, I could go on and on.

This year I’m due for something big and good to happen. Five years ago I married the most amazing man on the planet. It even rained on our wedding day. Not only is that considered good luck but it was during an awful drought and it was the first rain my area had in four months.

Since the good things seem to happen every five years, I’m hopeful. I’ll settle for a nice, uninterrupted vacation and the return of my muse.


Photo taken by me. I can’t believe I’m putting something up here with my awful handwriting! I wrote slow and this is as good as it gets. Also, look at the detail on the leather journal! I picked it up during an Art’s Festival in my home town. It was expensive and worth every penny. I was going to make the picture black and white, and I still might if I decide to use it again, but this first time I wanted it unedited so you all could see why I love this journal.

Sidenote: I’ve never had a Philly cheesesteak. I hate onions so I’m not going to get an authentic representation but I’ll try it and report back.

Another sidenote: It isn’t fiction but I just wrote almost 1400 words for this post. I think my muse is thinking about returning! That said, pardon the lengthy post!

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8 comments

  1. That truly is a beautiful journal. The photo captured me immediately (and I think you should keep it in colour).
    That abandoned summer camp could almost make me book a flight to New Jersey myself.
    I hope you have a lovely vacation and that your muse meets you somewhere along the way!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’ve heard many people say that their surgery on their back didn’t help. My husband had similar surgery done to his neck. He still has pain but it isn’t as excruciating as it used to be. I’m wondering–because I really don’t know–would yoga be good for you? I’m just thinking about the slower movements and the flow of those movements.

    My writing has gone amiss too, Kristi. Do you feel you’ve forgotten about something in the “process”? I feel that I have. I probably need a few workshops or email courses. Thinking about your fear of August, could that be playing havoc with your writing?

    Have a marvelous vacation, Kristi. I’m sure it will help, if only a little with your current woes.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for that AHA moment! It probably is my August curse fears, or at least partly. Another part is probably the pain.

      I don’t know about yoga, as there are certain motions I’m not allowed to do right now, maybe never again – such as twisting or bending. However, if I can figure out what I can do then I suppose yoga would be great for not only the muscle pain that sits in the middle of my back but also the stress of all this.

      As for writing, short courses, even ones I’ve already taken tend to work for me when I’m stuck. I think it’s the worksheets that do the trick. I should try those myself. I hope you find your answer soon!

      Liked by 1 person

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